Just thinking..

I thought life was beautiful until it took a turn.

Skipped work due to horrible sore eyes and performance tomorrow.

Loves,
Caitlin

Rainy Day

Don't you like the rain as it pours over you, making you wanna stay in the cold rain and chill..
as you walk in the rain, your vision goes blur.. the tiny hair on your arms stand in protest.
You want nothing but to stay in the rain..
Even if you wanna stay in bed, the next best place to be is in the rain..

Yes, rain heavier please and I shall cycle home in the cooling rain.

With the questions running through the mind constantly.. I can nvr have a good night rest again.
No matter how tired I am, my body refuses to sleep until nearly 3am.

This is wad i'm going through.
Silence is the worse treatment.
I rather voice out everything and make things go away, instead of sitting here and hoping that the feelings and issues go away.

Because 'I don't wan a boyfriend' is an invalid reason to you, doesn't make it an invalid reason to myself.
Suck it up and move on.
If I have interest in you, then we would have met up far more times than this.
You are the one who doesn't get the sub-hint.

It's your constant texting in every way you can reach me, that's irritating me.
Serious? Wechat, Whatsapp, sms, facebook..
You think I would have interest in responding to your msg-es?
You're wrong, very wrong.
I don't like such attention.

Bitch or wadeva, suit yourself.
I don't need you to define me.

Responding to lesser messages now, because I just don't wanna touch the phone.
Every message that comes in, interrupts my thoughts and my music player.

Rain, please get heavier.

Loves,
Caitlin

I'm done trying.

 #nowplaying - The one that got away

Well, i tried.
I have no one to blame but myself.

Lesson learnt.
How am i to move on, i guess i went overboard.
Maybe too sensitive, maybe too insensitive.

Surrounded by guys who like you, so wad?
Wad they bring is just companion.. which i dont need.
i'm fine alone.
They just dont understand why i'm so cold to them..
By putting the misses and loves at the tip of their tongue doesnt make me fall for them.
Low chance man, low chance.
i dont care you're loaded, good looking or wad, it doesnt matter.
Ya ya, to people who are reading this and thinks "oh, wad a bitch she is".
you know wad? i dont care. hahaha.
wadeva how you judge. i follow my intuition.

To the people who i really care about..
i dont have to say much, they know i'm there for them.
that's wad friends are for.
but well, these friends are normally the asshole ones.
hahah!
but, that's wad make us stay together after so many years..
and especially those that has been with me through those drunken nights.
i know you guys are the best.
you've never left me alone and took care of me.
words cant describe how much i love them.

For people who i care but they dont, then that's it..
i'll stay away and let them be.
but i'm sure i wont be entirely there for them when they need someone.
because they left first.

I'm done with this world, i've seen through it, i've been through enough pain.
This is the end.
I'm done with the crying, cutting and drinking every fridays.
and I'll most probably gonna stop overdosing my cough mixture at work..

Loves,
Caitlin

Personality Test

http://www.ipersonic.com/test.html#
You guys should try this test! It's damn accurate!
At least for my friends' and I~

Here's my result :D
http://www.ipersonic.com/type/SD.html

If you don't believe, then it's your business ^^

These few days are like crap.
Took MC on Tuesday and I guess things didn't get any better.
The cough is still there.. and the syrup is making me VERY sleepy during work.

Gastric isn't getting better, but well~
I did take my meals!
mum said, it's because of the past few years.. that's why. .___.
Kay then, then there's nth I can do right~

Loves,
Caitlin

I miss how we used to be. Im sorry, it's all my fault.

Last Friday was crazy.
Had three cups of tequila neat and i'm ready to ko but i didnt..

Sat morning went mac for breakfast then went to report to work at 8am. hahah!
Totally hangover :/
After work jiu went Somerset with Ivan, Weikang and tsefang for dinner at Senki.
Didnt eat much although i didnt had much of my lunch.
Dropped by Starbucks with Ivan, tsefang and roy for a coffee before going home..
and i cabbed home, felt like ko-ing any second.
and i believe i looked like shit. hahaha.
went home ko, and woke up in the morning for work at funan again.

After work on sunday, i went dhoby to meet shah :D
*evil planners* hehe!

Nothing much to say.
But im feeling body temp high and i'm coughing like nobody's business :/

Loves,
Caitlin

Heartaching

I believe that if I can't get over it, then face it.

After hearing him explain, it feels like it's all my fault.
I wished that night didn't happen and it was just one of the bad dreams I had.

There's nothing more than drinking that I feel like doing now.
Totally need something strong to chill me down.
Must stop relying on drinking, smoking and cutting to cool myself down.
My life's ruined by them.

Now, all I can do is to look forward to every Fridays.

I've got nothing much to rant.
I got no mood to rant either.
I just feel.. idk. I just feel like staying in bed all day and do nothing.
Sigh.

Plan for tomorrow.
Cycle home(6.30pm) - bathe/prepare(8pm) - dinner(10pm) - chalet(10.45am) - work at 8am(6.45am) - Senki buffet with clubbing peeps(6pm) - home sweet home <3

Ohhh, so packed! So tiring! hahahahahaha.
wad to say?! I LIKE!

Loves,
Caitlin

People at work

It's really irritating to work with people who has never worked before, and those who have worked but no experience.
How do they even work but gain no experience?!

It's getting more and more irritating to work with him.
Turn off my party mood and wadeva mood and turn on the serious mood.
He's a major turn off but i'm not gonna let him affect me.
I'm gonna do everything from the start whether he has done it or not.
Since he doesn't update me of wad he has done, then so be it. I'll treat it as though you've done nothing.
You forced me into this.
I don't care your result is better than mine or wadsoever, i'm done with your nonsense and bullshit.

Hearing how people complain about their internship is stupid please.
If there's something you can do, but yet you complain that you're bored and lazy and you have nothing to do..
you should fuck yourself.
I wish I have all the datas for my report then I can get busy with them, but I don't.
You have everything you need, just your focus and you refuse and whine.
What bullshit logic is this.
Irritating max.

Craving for pizza and fish badly T.T

Loves,
Caitlin

Substitute

Why have I never thought about it before?
Hahahaha, why did it never cross my mind before?
Before letting myself down, why did i not use my brain.

Last night at Dream was an eye-opening experience.
Drank too hard, got abit drunk.
Danced for less than two hours and we're already out.
While we were dancing, Mere told me an answer I've been waiting so long..
and i guess the answer did affect me in a way or another.
we continued to dance and i started not to give a fuck around me.
due to some unknown reasons, we two separated from the guys and dance.
after awhile, they came back and one of them came hugging me for idk wad reason. lol.
cabbed over to simei and ton thr till morning.
his mother and grandma were so sweet. haha.


Nothing much i wanna post.. but i guess, i still wanna vent.

Been feeling crap today, inside and outside.
the hangover was quite okay, tolerable.
kept thinking of the same issue over and over again.
having gastric the whole day.
well, blame me for that. I skipped meals.
yada-yada.
eyes like sored, guess i need some sleep.

Starting work at M1 tomorrow, so far!
Funan sia! sian max.
Hope that guy is friendly and will chat with me, or i shall die T.T

Beauty Empire pay coming a week late, fml.
I need to remake my ezlink card ):
I..lost it at home.
Stupid but well..
This is the curse man.
One semester, one new card.
SIGH.
I've been so careful lo!
kay wadeva.

Loves,
Caitlin

Heartless

Wadeva you wanna call.

To be honest, i feel abit guilty when he calls you a slut and i didnt say anything because i think you deserves it.
Toying with people who are sincere bout you.
Judging ppl through their wealth and cars?
is that wad love is to you?
i dont care whether you are working as an artiste or not.
i dont give a shit.
all you wan is fame and wealth.
you just love the attention ppl shower you with.

I dont like to badmouth my sisters, but i totally think you deserves all the bad mouthings.
toying my friends, one after another.

i dont really mind that you removed me from your fb but do it thoroughly and not just with one of the your accounts.
so i've helped you by removing from the other accounts.
you're welcome :)

I hate people who makes my friends upset, and i swear i'll make things difficult for them..
but in this case, i'm siding the outsider.. because you've been really overboard.
you put words into ppl's mouth and defame them.

end of story. i dont care.

Loves,
Caitlin

Piercing deeply, hurtfully

 

Isnt this piggy cute?

but the penguin is cuter lo. but nette bought it, and i swear i wont get the same as her.

shall head back and get it after i get my pay :D

totally have a good idea of wad to do with it. 

Maybe you've changed, or maybe i think too much.

guess i did.

why am i so stupid, hais.

gastric calling again. 

shall hit the sack now.

Loves,

Caitlin