Tuesday 19 January 2016

Lovesick

Lovesick is like homesick.
Homesick people are away from home but want to be home. 
Lovesick people are away from love and want to be in love.

You know you are in trouble when you experience the following:
- Smile to yourself for no reason
- Overreacting with your imagination (Esp. Female)
- Keeping little things as memories

A single touch will make your heart flutter.
A single word can make your heart skip a beat.

Endless memories to remember.
Worse when you have a good memory.

The smile, smell, reaction, expression.. everything.

Feeling like a schoolgirl again.

Monday 4 January 2016

Working life (POV of a 21yo)

Society says that we are the strawberry generation.
Damaged with a little hard pinch.

Who are we to blame? The schools for not teaching us how to survive this society?
Are we not too educated in terms of words and not life?

After 3 years of polytechnic studies and working for going two years, I still do not understand why is Amaths or Engineering maths relevant to our work.
Do you mean my customers or my boss might suddenly ask me what is sin x?

At the age of 21, I have to handle 6 staff in one department.
Yea, sounds easy right. What if I say these 6 are worse than handling a class of primary school students..

I have been teaching students of all age since I was in upper primary. I was even given chances to teach elderly on a one-to-one basis. None of those made me as stressed as I am now.

Like my colleague told me, times have changed. Staff don't follow instruction just because they are given instructions. They need reasons for the instructions.

For the past 4 years of working as event coordinator, part timers and ad-hocs, I have never met such unreasonable human beings before. Maybe my luck have ran out. My team is fucked up.

Being a short tempered and rebellious child since young, I have to admit that my tolerance level is so high that even my own friends are shocked.

After stepping into the society, I realized.. Singapore education is not helping students blend into the society. After my first year of work, having internship with the most fucked up student seems like a piece of cake.

Things I used to do when I'm upset or stressed, are not allowed because I am in the society.
I stopped drinking, because I always have work the next day.
I stopped hanging out late, because I always have to wake up early the next day.
I cannot vend my emotions on social media, because I cannot talk bad about my colleagues or company.
I cannot meet my friends often, because I am always tired by the time I end work and reached my house area.

Weekends, public holidays and leaves are all used to replenish sleep.
However, your body clock is so screwed that you will still wake up very early.
You have hard time falling back to sleep but your brain is refusing to move an inch.

So many things to express, so many things to cry over..
Hate looking so strong, my insides are crumpling down.

I seriously need a drink. HAIS.